Tuesday, September 28, 2010

PCOS diet

OK, I am seriously considering the PCOS diet. I have done just a very small amount of research and there are several PCOS diets to choose from. I obviously can't afford th $522.00 one! Also, I think it's COMPLETELY ridiculous that they would charge that much just because they know that infertile women will pay it to have a child! I feel like that is a huge rip-off and even if I could afford it, I wouldn't because I'm sure they are profiting at least 400 dollars! Anyway, to get off of my soap box... I would like to try one of the PCOS diets. Any suggestions?

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

What if she's the only one?

When I was pregnant with Bailey I remember feeling SO happy that I was pregnant. I was absolutely thrilled that God had given us this baby and we were finally going to be parents. The two things in life I wanted more than anything were a husband and a child. But I didn't want just one child. And, like most of you, I NEVER expected to have trouble having as many babies as I wanted. But, that just didn't happen. So, I now sit and wonder if this beautiful child will be my only child. I love her more than anthing! We couldn't have picked a more beautiful child. She's smart and funny and keeps me VERY busy. But I don't want her to be the only one. Now, I have other problems too. I worry about money ALL the time. We have problems in our marriage. Ok, no, that is not true, I have problems! I have issues! I have hurts and wounds that won't heal. I don't have any real desire to not be married to my husband. I just need my heart to feel better. I feel like I need to solve all of my problems on my own b/c God isn't helping me. I want another baby :( I want to be happy, and I want enough money in my checking account to be able to buy things we need. Maybe, I need a bigger dose of "happy pill."

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Never EVER...

leave peanut butter open on the counter!
Not even for a MINUTE!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Date Night

Last night was great. I don't know why I felt like this was so different than any other dinner out except that we left Bailey with grandma! We ate dinner at spaghetti warehouse and we spent too much money but it was worth it. I am feeling a lot better and hoping that things only get better from here. Thank you for all of your love and support. I am thankful that "I am woman" but that means more emotions too. I have been SO down lately and so upset/angry/sad that having just this one night really lifted my spirits.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

sadness

Today is a bad day. I couldn't stop crying all the way to work. I haven't had my "happy pill" for 3 days so I took one this morning and hope it helps. I don't really feel right letting the whole world know what happened over the weekend. But, no one died or anything that horrible. And, all seems to be better now with the situation I've been going through but I have a fear of it coming back. I'm extremely stressed out and overwhelmed. I feel like sleeping for 3 months and waking up in a better place. Just please pray for me. I'm struggling right now. Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I just don't know what to say.